Apr 16

Five Meditation Lessons
(I Wish I’d Learned Sooner)

I've never really told this story before.

I was never particularly interested in meditation. It seemed like something Other People did, and not something I could get into.

Then, in 2010, I began my yoga teacher training.

The studio I chose (ISHTA Yoga in New York City) had a strong emphasis on meditation and Ayurveda as part of its philosophy and practice. We were required to attend a set number of meditation classes as part of our training.

I waited as long as possible to go to my first meditation class.

This class is led by the founder of ISHTA, Yogiraj Alan Finger. It's over an hour long, and includes a short lecture, warm up movement, and about a 25+ minute sit.

For someone who had never "meditated" before, this was trial by fire.

It's worth saying that, in that first class I didn't really feel anything special. No lighting bolts of knowledge struck down and opened my mind. I didn't break into sobs and have a cathartic emotional release. I remember feeling mostly confused and wondering how to best position my legs so they wouldn't fall asleep. (Also, reallllly wanting to open my eyes and look around. )

I've learned so much over these past almost-ten years, both from my teachers and also from the practice itself -- the journey of sticking with it, picking it back up after dropping it, questioning it, and trying to understand the role of meditation in our modern lives.

Some of these lessons required a long-term relationship with the practice.

Some of these lessons, however, are things I wish I had known earlier; I wish that someone had sat with me and whispered them into my ear, helping me to feel a little more comforted along the way.

So, here I am whispering a few things to you, that I wish I'd known ten years ago, when I first encountered meditation.

1. Start small.

20 minutes is great, but is not a great starting point for everyone. Going from 0 to 20 overnight is not always possible, and puts a lot of pressure on us humans who are already feeling a persistent lack-of-time. I now realize that a sincere 2 minute practice is better than a guilt-ridden lack of practice.

2. Be flexible.

Not so much in your body, but in your expectations. The idea of a perfect practice, with candles and silence and great insights, is just a sneaky form of spiritual perfectionism. Meditation can happen anywhere and anytime, in order to ensure that it happens at all. Many times, meditations in my (parked) car have saved me and kept me in it.

3. Skipping a day is not a sin.

The power of momentum is real. So is the power of forgiveness, especially of oneself. If you skip a day (or a week, or a month, or 5 years) forgive yourself -- immediately, if possible -- and move on.

4. Resist the urge to compare.

Practice is personal. Deeply personal. Resist the urge to compare your practice and experience to other people's. It's just not helpful. Eyes on your own practice.

5. Check in with your life.

Meditation is not meant to exist in a bubble, separate from our everyday lives. It's meant to improve and enhance our lives in some real way. (And we can each decide exactly what that means for us.) Evaluate your practice by checking in with your life: "How is your life?"** Work with a teacher or mentor to create a practice that supports and sustains your life.